What do you wear to grad school?

The thing most on my mind today:

What should I wear?

That’s right. Orientation starts tomorrow and my primary concern is one of fashion: how much should I dress up? Is business casual adequate, or should I wear something as dressy as I would pick for an interview? What should I do? And honestly, my wardrobe is pretty limited—my nicest clothes are a little autumnal. If I decide I should go dressy on the first day, do I even have an outfit that would work in this warm weather?

What about that black skirt? No, a little too fancy I think. The short one? That’s wool. Hmm. OK. Maybe that nicer brown one? That’s a little too big, and I’m not sure it would work with the white shirt. The green pants? Too casual. The grey ones? Too hot. Argh! What will I do? Too late to go shopping. And let’s not even start on the shoes situation...

Maybe it’s all for the best, that I’m preoccupied with my fashion choices; if I weren’t obsessing over that, I’d have to worry about how hard it’s going to be working and going to school full time. Now, I’ve done this before: I worked 40 hours a week my senior year of undergrad, while taking a full 18 hour credit load. So I know that I am capable of excelling with a busy schedule, and I know myself well enough to recognize that I do my best work when I’m under pressure. It’s just a matter of time management and the ability to compartmentalize—which I’m good at.

(The little voice in the back of my head reminds me that I was working in a bookstore during undergrad, not an especially brain-intensive job, and that grad school is a whole different ball game.)

Up until about a month ago, I thought I was going to be able to ease into my double life. At work I would be mid product cycle, not exactly slow but not especially busy, either. The pressure there would be off, at least. It would be like wading slowly into the pool, one inch at a time.

Then...my deadline moved. Now I’m frantically trying to get my project under control with work, and starting school at the same time. Forget that whole easting into the water plan: I’m diving head first, and hoping the cold kicks my adrenaline into a highly productive gear.

Just to assure everyone: even though I’m nervous, I really, really, really think I’ll be OK. Everyone else seems to think I’m crazy, which is sort of giving me a complex. I’m not sure how many worried, loving looks (or long pauses on the phone) I can handle before I start throwing things (figuratively, of course—I’m not really a thrower). Someone at work on Friday actually said he thought I’d be just fine, that he hadn’t thought graduate school was as hard as it’s hyped up to be, and it was so wonderful and refreshing to have someone express confidence in my ability to manage my two lives, that I could have cried.

And, as someone I was chatting with on my flight back to Colorado this weekend said, “It’s probably good you don’t have any friends in Colorado, because you won’t have any time for a social life!”

Too true, at least for the next couple of months. But if I can make it through October, I can make it through anything. And it’s really exciting to be starting this new adventure! Excitement and adrenaline will get me through the next two months.